A Bucket of Rats

“I’ll have to buy a bucket of rats.”
“A bucket of cats!”
“No, not cats, rats.”
“Oh, a bucket of rats. But that’s thrice the price of a bucket of mice!”
“Not thrice, only twice. Has your brother still got lice?”
“Don’t change the subject. And don’t pick on him, it’s not nice! What will you do with the rats? Put them in silly hats?”
“No, I’ll make them dance.”
“Make them dance! You’ve got no chance! How did you come up with such a thing?”
“I saw a video where a dog started to sing.”
“A singing dog! No way.”
“You should believe every word I say.”
“Why? You just talk rubbish night and day. Tell me something that’s definitely true!”
“That is a request that you shall rue.”
“I still want to hear.”
“Are you sure you want to hear? It’s about your near and dear… I’m not the only one buying rats, they are too!”
“I thought they were buying gnats.”
“What would they do with a bucket of gnats?”
“Keep them in a tank.”
“What if they stank?”
“I don’t know, they could go to a smelly pet show.”

The next day

“Did you get your rats?”
“Yes, did your lot get their gnats?”
“Yup, can we talk about something that doesn’t involve rats and gnats?”
“What like, The breeding pattern of bats?”
“I was thinking more your trip to Blorenge.”
“I felt like an idiot dressed all in orange.”
“With your green hat you probably looked like a carrot.”
“It wasn’t as bad as when I was dressed as a parrot.”
“When were you dressed like that?”
“Don’t you remember? It was at Big Dave’s costume party, you were dressed as a bat.”
“Oh yeah, I got drunk.”
“Music was some new-fangled funk.”
“I didn’t like it, I prefer punk.”
“Dave smelled like a skunk and was dressed as a monk.”
“Wasn’t that party on a boat?”
“The Fat Goat!”
“What a name for a boat, where did he come up with it?”
“For Big Dave it just seemed to fit.”
“Big Dave’s party boat costume rave. A night I’ll never forget.”
“Because you fell overboard and got really wet.”

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