I’ve been watching a lot of South Park recently and one of the episodes features a vote for a new school mascot in which the options are a Giant Douche and a Turd Sandwich. The episode has one of the children believing that the vote is pointless as the choice is so ridiculous. By the end of the episode the writers make their point by having the boy learn that every vote ends up being between a Giant Douche and a Turd Sandwich in some way.
Another thing I’ve watched is the ITV political debate between Boris Johnson and Jeremy Corbyn. In the debate Johnson spoke longer than the host wanted and kept bringing every answer back to Brexit, Corbyn on the other hand refused to answer a direct question and dodged out of a few others. These are the two main choices in the next election.
On one hand we have Johnson who had his plans ready but did make himself look a douche by clinging so hard to one idea which he shoehorned into everything, even when asked a non-political question Brexit was his first answer and the running over time – whether his fault or the host’s – did make him seem slightly rude and unpleasant.
Then we have Corbyn who is our turd sandwich. He went into little detail about his party’s plans and wouldn’t state which side of the Brexit debate he stood on even when asked repeatedly. What is clear is that his intention is to spend a lot which resulted in a joke about a magic money forest. Such a vague idea of his plan made it seem like his leadership would stink.
I am a little biased as I will admit that I favour Johnson but the point of this post is that Britain’s political position in the world and at home means there’s no such thing as a good choice. Right now we’re left to choose the best of the worst so as with any election it’s a Giant Douche against a Turd Sandwich.
Below is a bit of extra information to help out on some terms I’ve used.
ITV = Independent Television (a tv channel)
Boris Johnson = Conservative Party leader (right wing)
Jeremy Corbyn = Labour Party leader (left wing)
Brexit = The name of the idea that Britain will leave the European Union